Building Engagement Before Obedience: The Secret to Reliable Training

[Malakai The Great]

If you’ve ever felt like your dog “knows” a command but only listens sometimes, you’re not alone. It’s one of the most common frustrations I see, and the fix isn’t more obedience, it’s more engagement.

Engagement is your dog’s desire to work with you. It’s not about luring, bribing, or controlling, it’s about creating a dog that chooses to tune into you even when the world is full of distractions. When engagement is strong, obedience becomes effortless. When it’s weak, even the best training falls apart.

Obedience teaches your dog what to do. Engagement teaches them why they should do it, and who they should do it for. A dog that’s only focused on the food in your hand will obey when they see a treat… and ignore you when they don’t. A dog that’s engaged with you works for your attention, energy, and approval, food simply becomes one of many rewards.


Here are a few ways to strengthen that connection:

1. Make yourself part of the game
Don’t just give your dog food or toys, become the source of fun. Tug, chase, run, and celebrate together. You’ll quickly see them light up at your energy, not just the reward.

2. Use movement, not monotony
GSDs thrive on dynamic training. Keep sessions short, animated, and unpredictable. If you’re bored, they are too.

3. Reward eye contact
Eye contact is the foundation of focus. Mark and reward it often. Over time, you’ll see your dog checking in naturally, even in distraction-heavy environments.

4. Be clear and consistent
Mixed signals break engagement. Your tone, timing, and intent matter more than perfect words. Dogs read energy faster than commands.

5. End while they still want more
It’s better to stop a session when your dog is still eager than when they’re mentally checked out. You’re building enthusiasm, not endurance.

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Before your dog can listen to you, they have to care about you. That’s the truth behind reliable obedience, and why engagement always comes first. If you focus on the bond before the behavior, you’ll get both.

 

[MyDogBitz]

Perfect. Articulated well.

When working on new behaviors, the best training sessions are super short. I literally just finished a training session in my dining room. It was 16 minutes long. We accomplished a lot in that time.

AS for getting undivided attention from your dog, get them addicted to play. If you do this, you'll have the opposite problem - getting your dog to leave you alone and just sit there. LOL.

 

[Kaia Murphy]

This actually clicked for me in such a big way, I never thought about it as why they want to listen instead of just how to make them listen. The “engagement before obedience” part makes so much sense.

I’ve noticed my timing gets better when I’m having fun with my dog instead of trying to be super serious, so I guess that’s a small piece of what you’re describing. Do you have a favorite game or routine you use to build that kind of connection?

 

[Andre]

Really great post Malakai.

Love this quote "Before your dog can listen to you, they have to care about you". Sounds very basic but extremely important.

 

[Malakai The Great]

Perfect. Articulated well.

When working on new behaviors, the best training sessions are super short. I literally just finished a training session in my dining room. It was 16 minutes long. We accomplished a lot in that time.

AS for getting undivided attention from your dog, get them addicted to play. If you do this, you'll have the opposite problem - getting your dog to leave you alone and just sit there. LOL.

Couldn’t agree more. Those short, focused sessions always seem to produce the best results, the dog stays sharp, and so do we.

I’ve found the same thing with play, too. Once a dog sees you as the gateway to all the fun, engagement stops being something you have to “train.” It just happens naturally. The hardest part after that is convincing them that downtime is a skill too.

 

[Malakai The Great]

This actually clicked for me in such a big way, I never thought about it as why they want to listen instead of just how to make them listen. The “engagement before obedience” part makes so much sense.

I’ve noticed my timing gets better when I’m having fun with my dog instead of trying to be super serious, so I guess that’s a small piece of what you’re describing. Do you have a favorite game or routine you use to build that kind of connection?

Exactly, once that idea clicks, it changes everything. You stop commanding the dog and start communicating with them.

You’re spot on about having fun improving timing. When you’re relaxed, you move more naturally, your tone flows better, and your dog reads that energy right away.

As for games, I like to keep it simple: engagement sessions that mix play and obedience. A bit of tug, a quick out -> sit -> re-engage. Or I’ll toss food behind the dog to reset position and have them sprint back for focus. It keeps them moving, thinking, and choosing to tune in.

The goal isn’t perfection, it’s to make working with you the best part of their day.

 

[Malakai The Great]

Really great post Malakai.

Love this quote "Before your dog can listen to you, they have to care about you". Sounds very basic but extremely important.

Thank you, I’m glad that line stuck with you.

It is simple, but it’s the piece most people overlook. Once the dog actually values the relationship, everything else, obedience, focus, impulse control, becomes a whole lot easier.

The mechanics matter, but the bond is what makes it all work.

 

[MyDogBitz]

This actually clicked for me in such a big way, I never thought about it as why they want to listen instead of just how to make them listen. The “engagement before obedience” part makes so much sense.

I’ve noticed my timing gets better when I’m having fun with my dog instead of trying to be super serious, so I guess that’s a small piece of what you’re describing. Do you have a favorite game or routine you use to build that kind of connection?

Basically, there are two types of games: cooperative and competitive.

The most basic cooperative game is fetch: You throw a ball, the dog chases the ball, catches the ball, returns the ball, willingly drops the ball to repeat the cycle. Dogs find this intrinsically rewarding. It taps into prey drive, herding instincts, pursuit and so on. It builds a great cooperative relationship between the handler and the dog.

The most common competitive game is tug: The basis of the game is that you are both trying to win the toy. This is the basic concept. Tug might be the most important skill you can teach a dog because of the rules and skills needed to play:

Skills & Rules:

- The dog must OUT on command.
- The dog must re-engage after winning.
- The dog must return the toy when tossed away and willingly re-engage.
- The handler is both a competitor, coach and referee. The dog accepts this authority.

There is so much that can be accomplished with tug that it would require hours of conversation. One of the biggest things that can be accomplished is creating natural authority in the relationship without causing conflict.

I'll say this, if I "train" my dog seven days a week, five or six of those training sessions look like me and my dog playing together to most people because that's what we're doing.

Once you and your dog are highly skilled in play, you add the final piece - the switch. You should be able to switch between play and work, work and play seamlessly. For instance, while playing tug, I'll drop the ball and do an obedience routine away from the toy, upon completion of the routine, I'll release the dog back to the toy and begin the game again. But I'll only do this two, or three times max while we're playing.

If you can control your dog while they're in a high state of arousal, which good play will cause, then you can control your dog in 99% of all other situations.

Something I'll add, if your dog is really skilled in the games you can combine everything into one session, catch, tug, and obedience.

I'm going to get a little trippy for a second, when you and the dog are flowing and in tune with the game it's almost like your dancing, reading each other and anticipating the next move. Everything happens smooth like water flowing through a stream bed. I had a session like this last week. It's hard to explain but you both know it when it's there.

 

[Malakai The Great]

Basically, there are two types of games: cooperative and competitive.

The most basic cooperative game is fetch: You throw a ball, the dog chases the ball, catches the ball, returns the ball, willingly drops the ball to repeat the cycle. Dogs find this intrinsically rewarding. It taps into prey drive, herding instincts, pursuit and so on. It builds a great cooperative relationship between the handler and the dog.

The most common competitive game is tug: The basis of the game is that you are both trying to win the toy. This is the basic concept. Tug might be the most important skill you can teach a dog because of the rules and skills needed to play:

Skills & Rules:

- The dog must OUT on command.
- The dog must re-engage after winning.
- The dog must return the toy when tossed away and willingly re-engage.
- The handler is both a competitor, coach and referee. The dog accepts this authority.

There is so much that can be accomplished with tug that it would require hours of conversation. One of the biggest things that can be accomplished is creating natural authority in the relationship without causing conflict.

I'll say this, if I "train" my dog seven days a week, five or six of those training sessions look like me and my dog playing together to most people because that's what we're doing.

Once you and your dog are highly skilled in play, you add the final piece - the switch. You should be able to switch between play and work, work and play seamlessly. For instance, while playing tug, I'll drop the ball and do an obedience routine away from the toy, upon completion of the routine, I'll release the dog back to the toy and begin the game again. But I'll only do this two, or three times max while we're playing.

If you can control your dog while they're in a high state of arousal, which good play will cause, then you can control your dog in 99% of all other situations.

Something I'll add, if your dog is really skilled in the games you can combine everything into one session, catch, tug, and obedience.

I'm going to get a little trippy for a second, when you and the dog are flowing and in tune with the game it's almost like your dancing, reading each other and anticipating the next move. Everything happens smooth like water flowing through a stream bed. I had a session like this last week. It's hard to explain but you both know it when it's there.

This is spot on, Bitz.

Most people underestimate how much real training happens inside good play. Fetch and tug aren’t just games, they’re frameworks. They reveal the dog’s grip, their recovery, their frustration thresholds, their confidence, and how cleanly they can transition between states of mind.

And you nailed the most important part: the switch. If a dog can go from 100 to calm obedience and back to 100 without conflict, that’s a dog who truly understands the handler and respects the relationship. That skill solves more problems than any piece of equipment ever will.

I’ve had those “flow state” sessions too, where the dog reads you, you read the dog, and everything feels effortless. You don’t get that from reps alone. You get it from trust, timing, and a handler who knows how to make the work fun.

Great write-up.

 

[MyDogBitz]

This is spot on, Bitz.

Most people underestimate how much real training happens inside good play. Fetch and tug aren’t just games, they’re frameworks. They reveal the dog’s grip, their recovery, their frustration thresholds, their confidence, and how cleanly they can transition between states of mind.

And you nailed the most important part: the switch. If a dog can go from 100 to calm obedience and back to 100 without conflict, that’s a dog who truly understands the handler and respects the relationship. That skill solves more problems than any piece of equipment ever will.

I’ve had those “flow state” sessions too, where the dog reads you, you read the dog, and everything feels effortless. You don’t get that from reps alone. You get it from trust, timing, and a handler who knows how to make the work fun.

Great write-up.

Some days I'm just flat out beat from work and I don't have it in me to do something but he's gotta get out and burn some energy off. That's when I break out the Chuck-it and I'll really run him hard with a good "chase & catch" session.

It's actually a nice session because believe it or not there was a lot of trouble shooting in the beginning with the game. He would run past me with the ball instead of returning it, sometimes he would run directly back to my vehicle and lay down, or he would grab the ball immediately after outing.

We fixed all of it. What I think was happening was he was confused between the two games. Now, it's effortless.