Is a breeder who refuses to give references a red flag?

Riopool24

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Hello, I asked a to give references, but she feels it's controversial. I don't understand because the application had me list 3 references of my own. I googled myself according to AI overview and other information I found.
 
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I wouldn’t call it an automatic red flag, but it is something to pause on and think about. Some breeders are genuinely protective of their past clients’ privacy and don’t want people feeling pressured to act as references. That’s reasonable. At the same time, transparency matters especially when you’re being asked to provide references yourself.

A good middle ground I’ve seen is breeders offering anonymized testimonials, connecting you with someone who has explicitly agreed to speak, or pointing you toward dogs they’ve produced that are active in sport, work, or family homes you can observe indirectly.

What matters most isn’t access to names, but whether the breeder is open, consistent, and willing to answer hard questions about outcomes, temperament, health issues, washouts, returns, and support after placement. If the refusal comes with defensiveness or shuts the conversation down, that’s more concerning than the refusal itself. Context and tone tell you a lot.
 
I wouldn’t call it an automatic red flag, but it is something to pause on and think about. Some breeders are genuinely protective of their past clients’ privacy and don’t want people feeling pressured to act as references. That’s reasonable. At the same time, transparency matters especially when you’re being asked to provide references yourself.

A good middle ground I’ve seen is breeders offering anonymized testimonials, connecting you with someone who has explicitly agreed to speak, or pointing you toward dogs they’ve produced that are active in sport, work, or family homes you can observe indirectly.

What matters most isn’t access to names, but whether the breeder is open, consistent, and willing to answer hard questions about outcomes, temperament, health issues, washouts, returns, and support after placement. If the refusal comes with defensiveness or shuts the conversation down, that’s more concerning than the refusal itself. Context and tone tell you a lot.
The defensive response she claimed, "inappropriate client's information."
Interrogation feels, like I'm Michael Myers or something I find an immediate red flag. Google 5 stars and website testimonials are a not enough to convince me. Shuts down the conversation about references. I gave her my own without hesitation I have nothing to hide.
Professional response, "Well I reached out, and the references responded no. If some happen to reach out I'll let you know. Are you still interested?"
I'm going to let go of this one and another. But I don't owe them responses going forward, to the ones I drop. Rejection is part of the game.
 
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The defensive response she claimed, "inappropriate client's information."
Interrogation feels, like I'm Michael Myers or something I find an immediate red flag. Google 5 stars and website testimonials are a not enough to convince me. Shuts down the conversation about references. I gave her my own without hesitation I have nothing to hide.
Professional response, "Well I reached out, and the references responded no. If some happen to reach out I'll let you know. Are you still interested?"
I'm going to let go of this one and another. But I don't owe them responses going forward, to the ones I drop. Rejection is part of the game.
That reaction would give me pause too, not because they protected client privacy, but because of how the conversation shut down. Transparency doesn’t mean handing out names, but it does mean being able to talk through concerns without getting defensive.

You handled it professionally and offered your own references in good faith. If that wasn’t met with the same openness, walking away is a reasonable choice. You don’t owe anyone continued engagement once trust starts to wobble.

Letting go and moving on is part of the process. The right breeder won’t make you feel like you’re asking for too much just for doing your homework.
 
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